I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
you stole their roomba and ran out the door so that you could 'set it free'.
we found you passed out on lawn and the roomba bouncing back and forth on the sidewalk.
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Randomize
