Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
I woke up in the closet and then I found my shirt in a bag of Doritos... how does that work out?
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
You know you have done too many drugs when you gum the sugar off your margarita without even thinking twice
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
I just walked by a dude at the gym covering himself in olive oil.
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
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