He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
During my first week as an adjunct prof, I played a fiercely fought game of squash with a law student and we wound up having hot, sweaty, angry sex right on the floor of the court. She is either the best or worst thing to happen to my academic career. Will let you know.
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
Randomize