I truly don't know anything about sober relationships. Normally I would just drunkenly yell "sex?" in a guy's face. What do I do now? Be like, sooo uhhh, wanna do it? Awkward, and even worse, I will remember clearly just how awkward it was.
Woke up this morning to my mom on the phone with my dad saying, "It's probably just your prostate." Reasons to move out. Go.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
you handed me the dorito you were about to eat and told me to 'keep him safe' while you went to the bathroom
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
Randomize
