i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
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