Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
Found someone cuddling with my Uggs this morning. Guess the hundred pillows laying next to him weren't good enough.
Randomize
