I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
Also, putting laundry hampers on my head and pretending I'm an astronaut is a good way to get caught in every door frame in the house.
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
It was the best present I've gotten since I was 5 and I got a fucking easy bake oven. I'm not pregnant for realsies. Celebratory party at the house tonight. Invite all the nice dicks you know.
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
What kind of gift says "I'm sorry you accidentally stuck your hands in my puke (even though you should know better by now)"?
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
Randomize