I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
I thought he was foreign, but it turns out when you're that drunk, an Ohio accent just sounds Russian.
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
My father has a definite type: blonde, busty, 18-22. It was awkward when I was in college, but now I'm over it. I play wingman for him and he buys me expensive purses for the assistance in getting him hooked up with girls younger than me. Win-win.
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