He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
I'm like connect-the-dots of drunk. Whiskey, bourbon, vodka, rum, gin. The hidden picture is me faceplanting.
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
Randomize