So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
he asked me to put his condom on because he couldn't see without his glasses
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
I took it upon myself to take one shot of tequila to have an excuse for hitting on my not-single coworker. It worked.
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
Randomize
