She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
I'm eating all of the evidence.
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
we were running to make last call and you stopped me and said very seriously "if i fall, go on without me. just make sure theres a beer in my hand when you go"
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
your life is going to be an empowering working mom montage tomorrow to Katy P's ROAR... --are you living in a yoplaít comercial?
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
Randomize
