why didn't you poke me back
Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
I just remembered I opened the taxi door when I was at a red light last night and puked. And then when I was done I closed the door and told him he may proceed with caution.
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
Siri just reminded me to pickup Plan B
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
Randomize
