I feel like i just miscarried Jesus's baby...
god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
He puked in the voicemail. That's a true friend right there.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
I made everything so magnificently awkward in under 15 seconds. I am magic.
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
Randomize