While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
I just ate 6 cheeseburgers with some homeless guy. Pretty epic.
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
Randomize
