3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
He just sent me a dick pic with his iPod held up next to it and the words "in relation to iPod." Geekiest booty call ever.
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
nothing says "functioning mature adult" like sneaking beer out of your mom's fridge in a lunchbox
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
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