I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
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