My brain says no but my pants say off.
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
Randomize
