i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
I'm going to have to start sleeping with my keys taped to my stomach.
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
Randomize
