Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
You're wonderful. How are you always such a good friend?
50% genetics, 50% driven by a desire for people to drunkenly eat donuts at my funeral and then have fantastic cry-sex afterward.
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
I woke up cuddling a ham. That's not a euphemism. I actually slept with an entire ham.
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
I’m 95% positive I adopted a bunny last night.
You had cocktails, didn’t you?
I just checked and if you bring a picture of your ex they will shred it and give you a free 'hater shot'. Would it be too much to print off one of their wedding pictures and bring it?
I really love that you're not going the 'why am I not married and having a kid yet?' route, but rather 'thank god I dodged that bullet'
Randomize
