you guys were way drunker than both of me
i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
after you took your Demerol you started flying around and talking like the robot ship on the movie Stealth. then you licked my iPhone and declared the mission a success.
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
I've created a drink called, "watching the sound of music with grandma." its straight vodka
I woke up to a head of lettuce on my nightstand, someones Honda abandoned in my yard, the cat partially shaved, and a empty bottle of sailor hanging by a scarf from the rafters. Oh, and 26 people apparently came though and rubbed my back in the process of the night. Happy 23rd to me!
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
So after your set last night some 42 year old woman bought me a drink, professed her love for your music, and then made out with me last night because she thought I was you. Thank you.
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
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