He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
"I gave a guy a handjob last night, on a dog bed, inside a fireplace. It's going to be a good year."
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
Randomize
