Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
Also, I've found a new way to get drunk at work for free. Everytime I make a bushwhacker and there's extra... I put it in a cup. Its the Never ending drink.
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
There's going to be a velveeta shortage. I'm not drunk any more, this is just dire info.
Apparently she almost had an affair at Outback Steakhouse, details to follow when I get home but the apple really doesn't fall far from the tree
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
Randomize
