I feel like I'm in dance class right now
He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
I snuck in through the doggy door to get his vodka. Do you think my ex will know?
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
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