how can u be prego again
My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
Randomize
