you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
I woke up wearing nothing but 7 partially eaten candy necklaces. Only one was around my neck. Don't even try to tell me I don't need plan B.
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
Your cousin just asked the bartender to start a round of vagina shots. Not body shots. Vagina shots. We're taking her out more often.
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
The bartender just legitimately thanked me for breaking the cycle of speed metal by playing mmmbop.
i don't think that has ever happened before in the history of man
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
Is Oprah even human
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
Randomize
