Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
so i don't know how many beers it takes to make a recliner look like a toilet, but that's how many i had.
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
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