Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
i came out of my blackout when my grandma called last night. it kinda sobered me up and i realized who i had been making out with. should i call and thank her for the defensive cockblock?
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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