By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
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