you turned your livingroom into a bong?
Walked into this guys room, saw a tickle me elmo under his desk with white stains in its mouth. This is awkward.
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
Randomize
