And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
captain&coke to the library. STAT. this is an emergency. this is not a drill. I repeat: THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
I think I was the only one who knew you were acting like you weren't drunk in public issues discussion this morning. Make sure you thank me in your Academy Award Speech someday.
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
There's no good way to say, "sorry your son saw me naked on top of your brother"
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
Randomize