He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
Note to self: when drunk try to remember that ctrl, alt and dance doesnt exist on a keyboard.
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
I'm about to initiate a game of drunk UNO.
Drunk UNO has officially been banned from now until forever.
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
I just saw a girl drinking wine and walking her dog in footie pajamas and a mad hatter hat. First day of the new year and I think I'm in love.
I feel like you should put up a missed connections ad for this..
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
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