This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
