did you get engaged???
So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
Did you see that girl I got with last night?
Girl? Oh...weird...to be honest Ive always thought you were gay..
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
4 words: hood of his car
I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
Randomize
