You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
I think vodka/water/skittles totally beats your crystal light mimosas
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
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