Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw
I love Texas.
It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
why im i the only drunk person in the library?
i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
Finished my senior thesis. How am I celebrating you ask? By drinking gas station white zif out of an empty candle holder by myself. I fucking deserve to graduate.
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
woke up, covered in gummy bears, with a note that said "the gummy army won"
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