let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
I fell off the front porch last night. Actually.. I dove. I dove off the front porch.
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
Sorry about the weird guinea pigs text. I was drunk and they were freaking me out
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
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