I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
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