In America we eat man semen.
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
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