No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
This morning my doorman told me it was an accomplishment for me to be standing and conscious after last night.
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
Its a little weird going to a wedding where I've screwed the bride and my wife has screwed the groom. Great wedding though.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
Randomize
