she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
My cat puked at the same time as me. Makes me feel better about myself, except he can stand and I can't.
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
Spent 30 minutes in the board meeting trying to figure out where the foul smell was coming from. Thought it was the guy's feet sitting next to me. Then i uncrossed my legs. Turns out it was my vagina. Thank goodness for travel size febreeeze.
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
Randomize
