i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
So I'm driving and this guy next to me at the stop light is reving his engine and honking at me. Motherfucker thinks that's because I'm asian and drive a honda I'm automatically going to race him
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
Walk of shaming dressed as a zombie hunter. This hangover feels like the actual apocalypse.
Vodka?
Forever.
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
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