im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
Dude this girl just said she'd take me to pleasure town while giving me head
Will Ferrell is probably jerking himself off somewhere wishing he was you
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
Green mimosas i think yes
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
im just gonna lie here and collect money in this whoppers bag while sprawled out on this bench and explain that its to buy weed for my hangover
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
On a brief change if topic, last night I dreamt I got shit faced with bill Nye the science guy and we went bar to bar and explained the science of alcohol to everyone who'd give us free drinks. We wore bow ties
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize