And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
So then the officer asked you how you were getting home and you told him "very carefully"
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
No he exists. Who else tells me no matter how drunk I am to pull out. He's watching over me so my bastard doesn't get created.
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
Randomize
