My carpet still smells like piss and I THINK YOU KNOW WHY.
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
This show inspires me to have sex in space
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
My coke dealer 411'd my work number just to see how I was doing and gave me his new number. He must miss my business
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
That time we were having sex when you were super drunk, I kept yelling out, "Oh God," and you said, "You're going to need him after this." Idk why I suddenly thought of that.
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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