Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
Randomize
