I have funfetti in my underwear...will you come get me?
Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
Bartender at the wedding asked if he was making my drinks too strong. I laughed at him.
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
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