No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
you texted me last night and told me you couldn't find the toilet.
That explains the puddle of pee in my closet.
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
I walked into a McDonalds at 8:30 am with a half-eaten apple and a solo cup. Never felt so judged.
It's gameday bitch. Man up.
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
I'm so high I have morphed into the monopoly man. Or maybe the Pringles guy. I don't know but I have a mustach now
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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