I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
He's a Shit stain on my heart
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
Her son walked into the middle of the living room, took off his diaper, shit on the floor, smiled at me, and walked out, as if nothing happened.
So date night went well?
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
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