What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
don't thank me. stop putting your penis in foreign objects.
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
Is it bad that John just came to my work to have sex with me bc I felt bad that he slept on his porch last night locked out and I missed all his calls?
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
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