Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
It's a sad day when you realize you are no longer above fucking in movie theater bathrooms.
Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
He was putting purell on my boobs saying "they need to be clean for later." He hadn't had a drink all night
He got me an interview at his law firm and his boss asked him what he had to say about me. His response "He dates CRAZY bitches."
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
Randomize
