If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
i just saw my boxers from 2 days ago stuck in a tree 4 miles from my house
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
Note to self: trying to grow pubes back = worst decision of 2014 thus far
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
Today's hangover is brought to us by Sailor Jerry's and your dedication to my alcoholism.
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
Randomize