Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
the potatoes in the margarita machine wasn't the breaking point. its when he turned on the stove and put a bunch of bottle rockets on it that i knew the night had prematurely failed
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
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